Posts Tagged ‘blogging’
Monday, January 18th, 2010
After a long and painfully unfruitful period of silence, I find myself mildly interested in writing again.
Just like when the Jews were chased out of Egypt by Hitler and his pack of chariot-driving werewolves, I have served my time in the wilderness and am ready to enter the ‘promised’ land of locusts and honey. I must say, a locust and honey burger sounds very tempting right now.
On a less religiously controversial point, I have a new stapler. It is shiny and black.
More information on staplers:
“A stapler is a simple mechanical device used to join pieces of paper together. Staplers were invented. A stapler differs from a sticky tape dispenser in that it dispenses staples rather than sticky tape. Staplers come in different colours and are sometimes made of metal and plastic, which is in turn made of atoms. Atoms are very small, even smaller than ants. With the right tools, you can safely split an ant, but you must never attempt to split an atom.”
Tags: blogging, meaningless possessions
Posted in General | No Comments »
Thursday, September 25th, 2008
HA HA!
I have just been reading some old shit from back in the day and realised that I am hilariouius!! Things were much funnier back then. There were funny people visiting my blog and they were also saying funny shit. I think the current suckiness of my blog might have had something to do with working for other people rather than myself. Now that I’m footing the bill it’s a lot harder to waste everyone’s time. Being a grown-up sucks.
Last week I had a virus on my computer and I had to wipe the hard drive. Damn! That was the end of my experiment in downloading TV shows off the internet illegally. Jesus has taught me a lesson, and I’m going to stick with him.
AUDIENCE PARTICIPATION TIME:
Do you download stuff off the internet? If so, how do you safeguard against viruses? Have you ever had a computer virus? What is a virus? What colour was your poo this morning? Do you think anti-virus software companies write the viruses?
Please discuss.
Tags: blogging, poo
Posted in General | 1 Comment »
Sunday, August 3rd, 2008
Several years ago, when blogging was cool, and every self-important twit (including myself) wanted to fling their thought-poop across the internet, Blogger was the bomb. If you wanted to be an internet celebrity, simply sign up for an account, punch in a few details, write a snappy article, and wait for the fans to come.
A few years down the track and I’ve learned enough about the web to realise that Blogger kind of sucks, and simply doesn’t provide for the kind of flexibility and control that I need. I was also tired of the .blogspot URL, needed my own space, and was tired of struggling with crappy templates.
After a little research I discovered that Wordpress is a free, robust, easy alternative with a powerful dashboard - easy to install, manage, extend, and customise. More importantly, I was delighted to discover I could import my old Blogger posts so my old stuff wouldn’t be lost, including comments and tags.
Here’s how to make the switch;
- Hosting: If you’ve got a web hosting account with a MySQL database, you can install and host Wordpress yourself. The main advantage is, you’ll get to have a cool web address like www.imabigknob.com. This takes a small amount of technical knowledge. Otherwise, Wordpress can host your site, and you’ll probably have to settle for a crappy URL like www.imabigknob.wordpress.com.
- Download: Let’s assume you’re a big knob who wants a decent web address. Download Wordpress, unzip, and follow the very simple instructions. You’ll need to contact your hosting provider to provide the database details, and edit your config file accordingly. Upload Wordpress to your directory via FTP and you’re almost there.
- Install: If you’ve configured the database file correctly, Wordpress will install in a matter of seconds and you’ll be up and running. Simple. You should be able to log in to your account, create posts, and pontificate to your heart’s content.
- Import: Importing your archives from Blogger: If you’re working with Blogger Beta, you can import all the old crap from your other blog. From the dashboard, click on ‘Manage’, and then ‘Import’, then ‘Blogger’. Once you provide your Blogger user name and login, Wordpress will automatically import everything within a matter of minutes
- Template: The default template for Wordpress is, er, very boring. You can download and install readymade templates from Wordpress, or, if you’re seriously into web design, you can create your own template like I did. This requires some fairly serious HTML/CSS/PHP knowledge, but if you’re interested, there’s an excellent screencast series over at CSS-Tricks which helped me out a lot.
OK I’m going to bed because it’s frickin’ late and my eyeballs are like sandpaper. ‘Night.
Tags: blogging
Posted in Web | 5 Comments »
Thursday, July 24th, 2008
Upon investigating a new URL for my possible whizz-bang personal website, I’m rather disappointed to discover that Australian Fishing Enterprises exists. More frustrating is the fact that an even better URL - afe.net - simply has a garbled message from ‘Ernie’.
It’s the same old story. It seems every time I try to do something worthwhile in life, Ernie comes along to screw things up. Yesterday, when I went to get my ham and avocado sandwich out of the fridge, there was a note:
“Thanks - Ernie.
P.S. don’t like wholegrain.”
I shake my fist at you, Ernie, and I spit pins in your direction.
Tags: blogging, designing the internets
Posted in Uncategorised | 1 Comment »
Saturday, July 19th, 2008
This blog was probably due for a bit of a rebirth, considering that it died somewhat of a slow and painful death over the last six months. I’ve removed my shitty template and installed something atrociously boring. I think I like it. I’ve also added a Twitter widget, cleaned up my links and got rid of the Google Ads. My revenue was about 22 cents over the last year or so. I feel so clean.
Now that I’m a super ninja web designer I’ll probably eventually leave Blogger and make a personal customised website instead, but that will take time and effort. There’s scope for a work-related blog, but I think it’s important to keep that separate. My clients don’t want to read about my bowel movements.
Blogging seems to be generally in decline, and many of my old pals have lost interest (like myself). I’ve also lost interest in Facebook. Twitter seems interesting, though.
Work-wise, I seem to be getting pulled into the web development field rather than web design lately. A couple of project opportunities have lead me to spend a great many hours reading manuals and fiddling with Apache, Drupal, CakePHP, and Wordpress recently and I’ve probably learned more in this last week than I ever knew. Being slightly more nerdy than designery, it could be a good path for me. Less client contact would also be a bonus.
Tags: blogging, designing the internets
Posted in Uncategorized | 2 Comments »
Wednesday, July 16th, 2008
Didn’t you know, blogging is sooooo 2005? It’s all about Twitter or Facebook or something now. In fact, Facebook is sooooo 2006. No matter what you do, you’re behind the times. That’s why I’m just going to sit at home and eat cheese from now on. I don’t even have a touch-screen television on my fridge!
Assuming Chocolate Rain wasn’t enough information about what’s been going on in my head for the last few months, I should probably fill you in. Now that my income depends solely on freelancing through my web design business, I’ve been intermittently panicking and shaking my hands around like a little girl. Sometimes I feel superbly confident, sometimes I feel like jumping out my office window and bolting. Nonetheless, things are going reasonably well considering it’s early days. I wear ugg boots, drink tea and often don’t speak to anybody for the entire day (except the dog). Working from home is the BEE’S CHEESE.
~~ THE WORDS ENDS HERE ~~
Tags: blogging, designing the internets
Posted in Uncategorized | 1 Comment »
Tuesday, April 15th, 2008
Generally speaking, I really couldn’t. Be arsed, that is. Since returning to Australia I seem to have been sucked into a vortex of busy boringness which is draining my will to write music, or write blog entries, or really do anything but fix things around the house and work on my sideline business. It’s not that I’m not enjoying life, it’s just that it seems to be going about 5 times faster than usual. This is starting to sound like one of those whingey posts that I hate reading, so feel free to lose interest and roll your eyeballs at will.
Something interesting is happening. I’ve got a month or so left on my full-time work contract, then I’m on my own. I’ve set up my own web design business, which I’m hoping to actually use to earn a living from the middle of the year. Crazy, I know. I’ve got a few jobs on the go right now, and hopefully things will heat up so I can work from home full-time eventually. With little experience in the freelancing front, it’s going to be an interesting experiment. It should be fun, and I’m not really worried. Yet. I’d better start getting serious about marketing pretty soon though.
The past few weeks have also been spent building a little doggy fence for our newest addition - a female Golden Retriever puppy we’re picking up this weekend. Trish is completely beside herself with excitement, and pretty much speaks of nothing else. Adjusting to becoming puppy parents should also be an interesting experiment.
Tags: blogging, designing the internets, dog
Posted in Uncategorized | 2 Comments »
Monday, July 16th, 2007
A Welshman, two Australians, two Englishmen, a New Zealander, and an American walk into a pub…
Sounds like the start of a bad joke, but that’s what happened at the Amazing 2007 London Blogger Meet-up Type Thing on Saturday night. I have now officially joined the legions of people who have made random friends over the internet, which seems much less nerdy now that I have done it. Because I am not nerdy. Right?
I’ll admit I was a little nervous, but it was all good once I realised the people from the internets were not going to kill me and eat my intestines. They all turned out to be good friendly sorts, and the type of people I enjoy drinking beer with. Above: Huw explains to Monica that he “likes big butts and cannot lie”.
Curly came all the way from Wales and therefore gets 100,000 points for effort. He is also friendly and generous, therefore entering the bonus round with the chance to win a set of genuine nail clippers.
Jumping on complete strangers is apparently socially acceptable in Wales.
Attractive and intelligent ladies: essential for a good night out. Why not call one today?
Complementary personalities, but our shirts clash terribly. How embarassing! Mental note: co-ordinate outfit with Huw next time.
Will claims to be a professional Ghostbuster but upon further questioning seems to know very little about spectres and such.
After drinking at the King’s Arms pub until midnight, we stumbled around talking about kebabs for a while and made our way to the Social for another drink. There I had my first Welsh Rarebit (delicious!), talked to some random Frenchmen, and stuck some post-it notes on Huw’s face. Fabulous!
Tags: beer, blogging, let's party
Posted in Uncategorized | 5 Comments »
Monday, June 25th, 2007
I’ve been thinking about this stupid blog recently. What is it? What does it specialise in? Why do I write in it? And who are you people? I don’t have any answers to these questions, but I like asking deep questions and rubbing my chin sometimes. It reminds me that I have a stubbly chin, which reminds me that I am nearly becoming a MAN.
My current thoughts about the internets are this: People really want to socially connect and express themselves online these days. It’s no longer an information dump and a place for nerds and spammers to make money - if you don’t connect to the internets, you miss out on connecting with your friends and family. You might even miss out on Friday night drinks. Some people even meet partners on the web and make SEXY TIME. You might say these people are losers, and you would be right, because that’s disgusting.
I, like so many others, have succumbed to the evils of Facebook (also known as Bookface, or Faceface in the Afe household.) This is because I’m a sucker for internet goodies and stupid fads. In addition to Blogger, I also have accounts with Bebo, Twitter, Messenger, Googletalk, Orkut, Last.fm, Digg, Panoramio, web albums, RateYourMusic, FilmAffinity, and countless other ridiculosities and apallingly popular abominations that I use occasionally. And using many things occasionally is just code for using everything constantly.
Will our kids be broadcasting their lives 24 hours a day? Creating their own TV and radio shows with their friends? One thing is for sure: most of them will be hyper-connected, have the world’s information at their fingertips constantly, and quite possibly be incapable of conducting an adult conversation. I intend on clipping my children over the ear every morning as a reminder not to be total social retards.
It’s dawned on me that I could spend all day logged into my Faceface account and never actually see any of these people in the flesh again. Some of them I haven’t seen for decades, and some of them I have never actually met in real life. When the apocalypse comes and all our computers die, I think we’ll all have to learn how to ride bicycles and talk to people again.
It’s all very true, and I am very interesting. I think have proven myself to be wise and knowledgeable in this post. I also think it will be good for me to get away for a couple of months, although I will miss the tender embrace and soft comforting bosom of the internets while I am travelling.
Oh, and by the way, drop me a line if you want to add me as a friend on Facebook.
Tags: blogging, observations and unhealthy obsessions
Posted in Uncategorized | 5 Comments »
Saturday, March 17th, 2007
You may notice a new header graphic on the Afe Blog!!!
This is quite similar to one I had like a year ago and then took down. I took it away because I knew you would truly appreciate it when I put it back up. Afe’s first rule of doing business: Make people expect less of you, then deliver the goods packed with punch!
It’s all part of my commitment to excellence, which has been part of my modus operandi since 1983, or 1995 or something.
Tags: blogging
Posted in Uncategorized | No Comments »
Hello, I'm Afe.
