A call for the standardisation of handshakes
Dear Cool People of the world who use Cool Handshakes,
I am not one of you. I don’t know the Cool Handshake you are trying to do. I won’t notice that you are a surfer dude, and that you are going to try the one with the vertical thumb.
If you are a hipster and try to ‘bump fists’ with me, I will grab your fist and try to shake it.
I once tried a Cool Handshake, and ended up gripping the tips of a stranger’s fingers as though I was about to kiss his hand. For my next handshake, I opted for traditional, but was met with a non-traditional. I can’t win.
From now on, I am going to closely inspect your hand before I shake it. Do not be afraid, I am merely determining which handshake should be deployed. Do not attempt to change the handshake half-way through, as I may end up standing beside you holding your elbow.
Kind Regards,
Afe
P.S. Handshake fail
Tags: shit that annoys me
Hello, I'm Afe.
